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Motivate Yourself 97: Reflections And Regrets.

In this months newsletter I'm going to write about something that seems a little morbid at first, but I'm sure you can get the right perspective on it.
My uncle died a few weeks ago and so I had a funeral to go to last month unfortunately.

In our culture funerals are usually a time for saying goodbye and grieving but I try to look on them as a celebration of someone's life rather than a commemoration of their passing.
So it was really nice to hear the eulogy by the vicar, as she concentrated on his life rather than his death. She spoke about the different jobs he'd done and the the interests that he had but more importantly, she spoke about the type of person he was.

And it made me think "What will they say about me"
Now I'm not even quite 40 yet and so I'm hoping to be not even half way through my life, but if there's something that I would like people to hear about me when I go then I'd better make sure that it's true by the time I do die!

What do you want people to say about you at your funeral? What are the values that you hold dear to you that need to become part of your behaviours and actions so that everyone knows what those values are?

If we want to be remembered as a great parent, then we have to act like one. A good son or daughter, wife or husband, then we have to act like it.
It's one thing to hold those values as important, but unless we do anything with them we are likely to look back when we're older with regret rather than be proud of ourselves.

Bronnie Ware, an Australian singer/songwriter worked as a nurse for many years in palliative care, and looked after people in the last weeks of their life. On her blog she wrote about the clarity of vision that people gain at the end of their lives, and how we might learn from them.

When patients were asked about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently 5 common themes surfaced over and over again.

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

These are the things that go through our mind when it's pretty much too late to do anything about it, maybe we all need to learn from this and prioritise!
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