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Motivate Yourself 108: Reframing

As winter gets closer and the warm summer that we had this year seems so long ago we have a choice; we can either recoil at the colder, damper weather or we can appreciate the leaves changing colour, the excitement of the build up to Christmas and the ability to see the sun rise without having to get up super early!

It’s up to you – the start of winter can be a good thing or a bad thing depending entirely on the frame that you put around it.

The idea of framing can be used in many areas of life. If things don’t go the way you want them to you can choose to moan and be fearful of it happening again or you can learn from it and move on.

If someone has been hurt in a relationship they can decide that people are untrustworthy and that, in order to avoid getting hurt, can never trust anyone ever again.

This frame of “people are untrustworthy” may work for a short while as it can keep us emotionally safe and prevent us from getting hurt.

But it can also lead to loneliness.

By reframing “people are untrustworthy” into “the person who hurt me in the past is untrustworthy and I deserve a better partner” it allows us to let go of the past and become a happier person.

Reframing a negative situation is something we could all do with doing from time to time.

Driving to Devon in the summer I was stuck in a very nasty traffic jam, and it would have been easy to become frustrated or angry. But with a simple reframe of the situation I was able to enjoy the music I was listening to and appreciate the views of the hills and farmland around me that, had I been moving, I wouldn't have been able to do so well.

After all, I would much rather be sitting in traffic not moving than be the cause of the jam; which was an accident further up the motorway.

It’s often said that “every cloud has a silver lining” but if you aren’t looking for that silver lining in the first place you will never see it.
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Episode List

Episode 138: Keeping Up With The Joneses
Episode 137: The Likeable You
Episode 136: Why It's OK To Be A Loser
Episode 135: The Psychology Of Extremism
Episode 134: Are You A Lobster?
Episode 133: Critical Thinking
Episode 132: There Is Nothing Either Good Or Bad
Episode 131: The For And Against Of Imagination
Episode 130: Loneliness & Social Networks
Episode 129: Letting Go Of The Past
Episode 128: What Is Love?
Episode 127: Procrastination
Ep. 126: Who Were You Before The World Changed You?
Episode 125: Stop Saying "Sorry"
Episode 124: Emotional Contagion
Episode 123: Patience
Episode 122: Building On Your Foundations
Episode 121: Dealing With The Critics
Episode 120: Being Assertive. Just Say No!
Episode 119: Inactivity
Episode 118: Social Functioning & Evolution
Episode 117: Unleash Your Inner Superhero
Episode 116: Goals, Values and Priorities
Episode 115: 10 Tips To A Happier Life
Episode 114: Lies And Confabulation
Episode 113: Confirmation Bias
Episode 112: Are You An Imposter?
Episode 111: What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger
Episode 110: Are New Years Resolutions a good idea?
Episode 109: The African Violet Queen Of Milwaukee
Episode 108: Reframing
Episode 107: Spiders And Behaviourism
Episode 106: Practise Makes Perfect
Episode 105: Fear Of Flying
Episode 100 - 104: Happiness
Episode 99: Body Image And The Media
Episode 98: Evolution and Adaptation
Episode 97: Reflections And Regrets.
Episode 96: Dealing With Fear
Episode 95: Confidence
Episode 94: Enthusiasm
Episode 93: Tips To Relieve Christmas Stress
Episode 92: Dealing With Change
Episode 87 - 91: Self Esteem
Episode 86: Correlation Does Not Imply Causation
Episode 85: The Importance Of Being Lazy
Episode 84: Elephant Chains
Episode 83: Eating Bananas And Setting Goals
Episode 82: Ignoring The Media And Listening To Music
Episode 81: Awakening The Instincts
Episode 80: The Fine Line Between Love And Hate
Episode 79: The Best Medicine
Episode 78: A New Start
Episode 77: Time Distortion
Episode 76: Making Decisions
Episode 75: What's In A Name?
Episode 74: Pushing Ourselves Further
Episode 73: Conformity
Episode 72: Purpose
Episode 71: Perspective
Episode 70: Expectation
Episode 69: The Mind / Body Link
Episode 68: Overcoming Shyness
Episode 67: Mood Boosting
Episode 66: Sabotaging your goals
Episode 65: Self Talk
Episode 64: Money Makes The World Go Round
Episode 63: First Impressions Count
Episode 62: False Belief
Episode 61: Absolutes
Episode 60: The Psychology of feeling calm
Episode 59: Belief
Episode 58: Anchoring Emotions
Episode 57: Negativity and Perspective
Episode 56: Health And Happiness
Episode 55: Imagination vs Reality
Episode 54: Change